TQR Confidential

Saturday, May 03, 2008

I'm not hostile, I'm just taking over


Hello, I return to you, the investors, not as a conquering force, but, darn it, I hope a steadying one. It's not that Rorschalk was so bad, I mean the fella knew how to spot a strong capital gain from a mile away, but, unfortunately his profit margin was scads and scads in the red. Dreadfully, so, like a lobster I'd say. So. Needless to say, there will be some changes around here. No more laissez faire, but most definitely micro management. We'll be pinching every penny, cutting all the fat, and this goes for all manner of literary device so chosen, too. For instance, at the next quarterly meeting I will be proposing we move away from this fascination with novella length fiction and try our hand at what is all the rage these days on the old Web, Flash fiction! Micros, even. Something an investor can bite off and chew in less than 30 seconds instead of having to get impacted legions on their backsides taking in the ginormous works heretofore offered by this firm, before. I'll be bringing in my own team of managers, too. Not to worry, we're keeping all current Terminali and Floorite personnel. They'll just be answering to my capos, now. Rest assured, I will be meeting with each of them to plumb the depths of their assorted wants and needs. Please know, that I am not without a certain amount of compassion, that is as long as it does not interfere with the bottom line. There will be other changes forthcoming. It is my aim to continue with the whole readerly excellence and all that, while at the same time drastically improving the profit margin that has heretofore been nonexistent.

Sincerely, T. Quincy Rockefeller