Mea Culpa to HostedToday!

It seems I spent all last week behaving badly toward HostedToday in error. Little did I know the difference twixt a server and a domain, let alone the helpful and profane. You see, HostedToday served up TQRstories, but had nothing to do with parking us. It wasn't until somebody from the kind folks at Hosted Today told me about 20 times that they were servers, not holders of the site did a little bulb go off in my head and I remembered that I had had dealings with a separate company altogether from that which I wanted tqr transferred away from and that to which I wanted it to be received. And then it took me another day or two to find the e-mail and jump through all the hoops until Friday night I was able to come to the inner sanctum of all that I had been leading up to for nigh on a week whilst the site languished in cybro (that's the contraction for cyber-limbo, don't you know?) and I was able to click to be kind in the right measure and the site somehow, mysteriously, magically and righteously was reoncstituted on brand new platinum servers. So. Let me be clear, HostedToday didn't give me any run around, it was just that they were dealing with a cybron (ie cyber moron) who didn't know his ass from his elbow or a server site from a domain. And now I'm just being redundant so, apology made, I'll bid you adieu.

The Twilight Zone?!

There is a dimension, beyond that which is uniquely known to geeks.

It is a dimension as vast as a nerd nasal passage and as timeless as a referral to the "admin department." It is the middle ground between geeks and dweebs who staff nefarious server boiler rooms, between malfeasance and idiocy. And, it lies between the pit of TQR's fears and the summit of his inability to gain any kind of useful knowledge in this hell. This is the dimension of buck passing. It is an area which we call the Hosted Today Zone.




My name is TQR. I represent TQRstories.com. I mailed you a $100 check in the mail to pay up what I owed before dropping your service because it was totally unsatisfactory. Can you finally just drop me from your servers?! I paid you what I owed! Now my site is suspended again, I'm assuming because of you guys again! Leave me alone! Get rid of me, for Christ's sake! I've got a new server company. Stop suspending my account! I don't have an account with you anymore!


HostedToday Support
Posted On: 26 Mar 2009 07:20 PM

Dear T,

We have forwarded your support query to administration department, kindly hold on while I get some dental floss.

Regards,
Dirk Gently
Technical Support


HostedToday Support
Posted On: 26 Mar 2009 07:54 PM

Dear TQR,

We have un-suspended the domain, please verify. I will hold as I listen to an old Kraftwerk EP.

Regards,
Hanz
Technical Support


TQR
Posted On: 31 Mar 2009 08:08 PM

Thank you for unsuspending. And I closed my account with you, but now my site is not pointed to the new servers. Is there anyway you can help me out in this process? tqrstories.com has been down for a few days now and I don't know what I'm doing at all. Anyhow. Any advice you can give me will be much appreciated.


HostedToday Support
Posted On: 31 Mar 2009 08:11 PM

Dear tQR,

We find that the domain is still using our name servers and still pointing to our server, contact the suport team of the server where you are hosted and use the name server they provide as the dns settings have to be done by them. We are only here to serve you, man. Believe me now, this is no cookbook!

Regards,
Hanz
Technical Support


TQR
Posted On: 01 Apr 2009 03:38 AM

Dear Hanz,

Here is what the new company said I must get from you in order to make the transfer:

1) Unlock your domain for the transfer,
2) Provide you with the EPP key that allows your domain name transfer,
3) Alter your domain's administrative email address to something you have an access to.

I don't know what this all means, but maybe it makes some sense to you? Could I give you the code for the new server and you could "point" tqr at them that way?


HostedToday Support
Posted On: 01 Apr 2009 03:46 AM

Dear Tqr,

We have forwarded your request to our administration department.

Kindly hold on until we get back to you with an update or I will hunt you down like a dog and slice you open from your goddamn pubic bone to the bottom of your goddamn neck!

Regards,
Nick.
Technical Support


TQR
Posted On: 01 Apr 2009 08:01 PM

OK. I appreciate it. Please, if you would, get back to me as soon as you possibly can. I'm losing business by the hour.


HostedToday Support
Posted On: 01 Apr 2009 08:28 PM

Dear tqR,

We have already forwarded your support query to our administration department, kindly hold on until they get back to you with an update. And by kindly, I mean, "shut your fucking mouf!"

Thank you for your patience and understanding.

Regards,
Ruben
Technical Support


TQR
Posted On: 02 Apr 2009 07:14 PM

The status of this ticket is "On Hold." I hope this doesn't mean you're going to forget about it. I'm at your mercy. My site tqrstories.com has been down all week and I need your help to get it back up again. Why has this ticket been put on hold?


HostedToday Support
Posted On: 03 Apr 2009 01:11 PM

Hi t,

Your domain was down because there where two index page configured to your domain and we fixed your issue and the domain "tqrstories.com" is loading up fine.

We are extremely disappointed to learn that you are not continuing our services. Please let us know whether we can be of help at any level to get you moving with us for another period of subscription thereby keeping your business with us.

Kindly reconsider your request to cancel the subscription and we are eagerly waiting for your response over the same. And remember, you can check out any time your like, but you can never leave.

Thanks
Raven.
Technical Support


TQR
Posted On: 04 Apr 2009 06:05 AM

Thank you for checking into it. I decided to change servers because I didn't think I was getting enough bandwidth for the users, limiting the capacity of the site. Your support has always been very timely and considerate. I appreciate it, but am going to stay with this new server and see if my traffic increases. Thanks again, for your services.

HostedToday Support
Posted On: 04 Apr 2009 06:10 AM

Dear TQR,

We have forwarded your ticket to the administration department.

Please hold on get back to you with updates.

Regards,
Gibbs
Technical Support


TQR
Posted On: 06 Apr 2009 04:09 AM

Look. I've paid off my debt to you guys. If you could just do these three things so I can transfer my site to the new servers!

1) Unlock my domain for the transfer,
2) Provide me with the EPP key that allows my domain name transfer,
3) Alter my domain's administrative email address to something you have an access to.

Do this for me, and I will be eternally grateful! Please release me!


HostedToday Support
Posted On: 06 Apr 2009 04:37 AM

Dear Tee Q Are,

We have already forwarded your ticket to the administration department.

Please hold on get back to you with updates.
Neener neener neener. Nana Nana boo boo!

Regards,
Gibbs
Technical Support


TQR
Posted On: 06 Apr 2009 06:54 PM

Yes. But now you've gone and "closed" this ticket. Is the admin department going to re-open it when they've opened the EPP key for me?


HostedToday Support
Posted On: 06 Apr 2009 07:01 PM

Dear TQR,

When we forward the ticket to administration department, we send with the ticket id so even if the ticket is in hold or in closed state they can find it. You recalcitrant bloodsucking pest that you are!

Regards,
Hanz
Technical Support


TQR
Posted On: 07 Apr 2009 04:54 AM

Fine. But what is the delay? I've paid off my debt to you, and now all I ask is that you give me the information and/or service I require to make the jump from your company to the new one I have chosen to replace you. I'm sorry that I had to do this, but it is totally bogus for you to be holding tqrstories hostage like this. It's as if you're stringing me along so you can ask for more money in return for your future (non) cooperation. Can't we all just get along?


HostedToday Support
Posted On: 07 Apr 2009 05:12 AM

Dear Tqr,
Kindly hold on until our administration department get back to you with an update. And by "Kindly" I mean if you send me another message I will crucify you with railroad spikes!

Regards,Nick.
Technical Support